Copenhagen & climate change, health care, financial industry regulation…it's enough to make one's head spin.

And that's apparently exactly what is happening with the knuckle-draggers of our society who seem to have grasped quite well the proper use of microphones and the InnerTubes but can't seem to get their heads around the most complex issues facing us today.

Like little kids throwing a tantrum, not-so-silent minority of flat-earthers, Kenyan-birthers and give-the-rich-more-girthers just keep screaming louder and louder as the right-wing shrill appears to get sillier with each passing day.

Why do we give them any cred to begin with? Oh yea, wait. I forgot. They were in charge of this country for eight years and they did a great job, didn't they?

Let's review: two wars (now starting their eighth and ninth years), economic catastrophe, refusal to address climate change. Yep, good job! Now all you want to do is roll around on the floor shouting, "No! No! No!"

With an homage to the Box Tops, "When I think about the good love you gave me, I cry like a baby."

So, here comes Joe Lieberman, now, crying about Medicare being extended to people at age 55…"just like a puppet on a string."

And here comes the Faux News and their romper room followers, crying about…well, everything…but especially health care reform and efforts to curb climate change…"just like a little bitty baby now."

And here comes Wall Street, crying about the potential to actually re-regulate some of the abuses that helped take us to double-digit unemployment… "living without you is driving me crazy…I cry like a baby."

No, wait…the "drivin' me crazy" part should be about the Teabaggers. Lord only knows, what their tantrums are all about! 'Cept, maybe, we all really know many of them just can't handle having a president who doesn't look like previous presidents.

These are not particularly complex minds from which we hear these shouts of, "no, no, no!" Bless their little hearts and little brains. Maybe they just can't handle the tough stuff.

Maybe it's time for them to just put on their listening ears and pay attention. Here's a pacifier. Go suck on a candy cane and get even more wired up, then crash and sleep for a while and let the adults clean up the mess.

The President of the United States, upon accepting Thursday the Nobel Prize for Peace:

"I do not bring with me today a definitive solution to the problems of war. What I do know is that meeting these challenges will require the same vision, hard work and persistence of those men and women who acted so boldly decades ago (World Wars I and II). And it will require us to think in new ways about the notions of just war and the imperatives of a just peace."

"We must begin by acknowledging the hard truth that we will not eradicate violent conflict in our lifetimes. There will be times when nations — acting individually or in concert — will find the use of force not only necessary but morally justified."

No, Mr. President, we do not have to accept what you call a hard truth.

"I make this statement mindful of what Martin Luther King said in this same ceremony years ago: "Violence never brings permanent peace. It solves no social problem: It merely creates new and more complicated ones." As someone who stands here as a direct consequence of Dr. King's life's work, I am living testimony to the moral force of non-violence. I know there is nothing weak, nothing passive, nothing naive in the creed and lives of Gandhi and King."

Amen, Mr. President…listen to those words. Read them again.

"But as a head of state sworn to protect and defend my nation, I cannot be guided by their examples alone. I face the world as it is, and cannot stand idle in the face of threats to the American people. For make no mistake: Evil does exist in the world. A nonviolent movement could not have halted Hitler's armies. Negotiations cannot convince al-Qaidas leaders to lay down their arms. To say that force is sometimes necessary is not a call to cynicism — it is recognition of history, the imperfections of man and the limits of reason."

With all due respect, Mr. President, non-violence is the only answer to evil. A nonviolent movement could have halted Hitler's armies if only the courageous of the day – and they existed – could have had the backing and will of other, more powerful witnesses to peace: the Church, which chose to remain silent.

"So yes, the instruments of war do have a role to play in preserving the peace. And yet this truth must coexist with another — that no matter how justified, war promises human tragedy. The soldier's courage and sacrifice is full of glory, expressing devotion to country, to cause and to comrades in arms. But war itself is never glorious, and we must never trumpet it as such."

Mr. President, hear the contradictions in your words. If war is necessary or just why do we pursue it when we know the result is human tragedy?

"But we do not have to think that human nature is perfect for us to still believe that the human condition can be perfected. We do not have to live in an idealized world to still reach for those ideals that will make it a better place. The nonviolence practiced by men like Gandhi and King may not have been practical or possible in every circumstance, but the love that they preached — their faith in human progress — must always be the North Star that guides us on our journey. For if we lose that faith — if we dismiss it as silly or naive, if we divorce it from the decisions that we make on issues of war and peace — then we lose what is best about humanity. We lose our sense of possibility. We lose our moral compass."

"Like generations have before us, we must reject that future. As Dr. King said at this occasion so many years ago: "I refuse to accept despair as the final response to the ambiguities of history. I refuse to accept the idea that the 'isness' of man's present nature makes him morally incapable of reaching up for the eternal 'oughtness' that forever confronts him."

"So let us reach for the world that ought to be — that spark of the divine that still stirs within each of our souls. Somewhere today, in the here and now, a soldier sees he's outgunned but stands firm to keep the peace. Somewhere today, in this world, a young protestor awaits the brutality of her government, but has the courage to march on. Somewhere today, a mother facing punishing poverty still takes the time to teach her child, who believes that a cruel world still has a place for his dreams."

"Let us live by their example. We can acknowledge that oppression will always be with us, and still strive for justice. We can admit the intractability of deprivation, and still strive for dignity. We can understand that there will be war, and still strive for peace. We can do that — for that is the story of human progress; that is the hope of all the world; and at this moment of challenge, that must be our work here on Earth."

We can understand there will be war, Mr. President, but that does not absolve us of our responsibility to prevent it, to end it, to always seek peace.

A monster 54-square-mile iceberg is floating north toward Australia but don't worry, U.S. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid said late Tuesday he'd throw the public option under the bus and send the bus to block the iceberg.

Seriously, WTF? Why are we still hung-over from the insanity of the Bush years? What the hell is going on up there?

That dynamic, forceful, courageous Senate Leader Harry Reid said late Tuesday the Senate was just kidding, anyway, about any meaningful health care reform.

"We don't really need that," Reid said. "The insurance companies are doing just fine…Oh, hey Bob, how's the fam? Hope to see you and your satchel of dough at the cookout on Saturday."

Okay…Reid didn't really say that…maybe…at least it's not really recorded anywhere.

Reid really did say late Tuesday he and 10 other senators reached a deal on health care reform. They said the public option portion of the bill he introduced a couple of weeks ago wouldn't really go way – just be sidelined…put on the bench…given movie money…told to guard the car.

According to others, the new deal (wonderful irony) would allow people 55-64 to "buy" into Medicare as a health insurance plans negotiated by the U.S. Office of Personnel Management with health insurance companies. The plans would be similar to health insurance plans currently offered to members of Congress (which really ain't that great).

If all that didn't work, only THEN would a public option health plan kick in.

So, let's see…let's add this up…3 carry the 1, divided by pie or let them eat cake…

Okay, got it: we're still forced into buying expensive health insurance plans from the companies who are already cutting off our oxygen.

Yea…sounds like a good plan.

Still don't have a good explanation for why Medicare can't simply be expanded to cover everyone. Oh well…that must be way too simple.

Okay…back to this iceberg thing.

It seems a 12-mile-long; 54-square-mile iceberg is floating toward the western coast of Australia. It is currently close to 1,700 kilometers from Australia but that puts it at latitudes unseen by Antarctic icebergs since the 19th Century when clipper ships plied those waters between Britain and its penal colony.

Guess the iceberg didn't get the leaked emails exposing climate change as a fantasy.

Oh…and by the way…note to right-wing nut jobs: Denmark and Norway are actually two different countries.

It was 68 years ago our nation endured the day of infamy in Pearl Harbor, almost forgotten now amid the ruble of September 11, 2001.

But, hey, not to worry. Our U.S. Senate did its best over the weekend and into this week to give us days of insanity and they argue about changing health care or keeping it the same while expecting different results.

And, ladies, um, that thud you feel inside you is your uterus being kicked about in the Senate's health care debate like a football.

Just as they did a few weeks ago in the House of Representatives, so-called conservatives (Democrats, mostly) will try to tie the tubes of health care reform to the political issue of abortion…which at this point is legal and safe in America as an emergency medical procedure.

In one of the greatest political ironies of our day, conservatives who tout among standard ideals individual freedom and, especially, freedom from government intrusion in our private lives, will try once again to get government as tight into the female reproductive system as possible.

Never quite understood how the conservative position on individual liberty doesn't extend to women and their private health decisions but, hey, nothing's ever fair about politics.

Ever notice how it's mostly men who take this position on Capitol Hill? One doesn't generally hear the women of Capitol Hill arguing vociferously for the government to mandate their individual decisions on reproductive health.

Oh, and by the way Congress, you already banned the use of federal funds to pay for abortions way back in 1976 with the Hyde Amendment.

But none of that matters now. We have health care reform to scuttle and just about any political weapon will work – including lies and innuendo and fear and intimidation.

We've got to protect our phony-baloney jobs, gentlemen, and keep those huge political contributions flowing from the very profitable health insurance industry! Just ask Joe Lieberman!

Sure, we can spend $1 TRILLION and counting on endless war but, heck-fire, we'll take it to the mat and make any excuse to keep from reforming a for-profit health care system run amok.

Oh yea, and according to the Congressional Budget Office, the health care plan adopted a few weeks ago by the House of Representatives actually SAVES the government money, reducing the federal deficit in its first decade.

Oh, well, small points.

Maybe its appropriate Mel Brooks was enshrined Sunday at the Kennedy Center in Washington as one of our greatest living artists.

Perhaps, as a back-drop to the Senate health care debate, they can lower a giant movie screen and show on a continuous loop the campfire scene from, "Blazing Saddles."

BREAKING NEWS: In a discovery sure the shake the very core of the scientific community, the Faux News Service has reported emails obtained from the University of Hackenberry reveal the earth is flat.

The emails, spirited off Sarah Palin's tour bus by Lou Dobbs and his assistant, Pancho Cisco, while she was being whisked across the country in a Real American's business jet, also reveal gravity to be a complete and utter hoax.

"People and objects stick to the earth because they are heavy," according to one of the leaked emails. "We'll have to trick the data to keep this gravity-thing going."

Dobbs told the Faux News he was looking in the couches of Palin's empty tour bus for change when he discovered the emails. He said he was hoping to find enough change to pay her for a photograph.

"The earth is definitely flat," read another of the discovered emails. "Flat as a pancake. Scientific data has been fudged for years to give the impression of the earth's spherical nature."

Faux News morning show host Steve Douchie, in a conference call transmitted over the wireless in Morse Code, revealed the series of Hackenberry U. emails prove exactly what we've thought all along: the flat earth is being carried about on the back of a giant tortoise.

"That big yellow ball we see each day is simply the tortoise's watch as he raises it to check the time," Douchie said.

This stunning revelation is sure to send shock waves through the scientific community, which has steadfastly for several years now insisted the earth is round and gravity is real.

A spokesperson for the Palin entourage of regular folks said the former governor has not read anything since quitting her job as governor of Alaska and has been too busy promoting her book around Middle Earth to see the emails allegedly found on her empty tour bus.

According to an envelope found with the emails, they were originally spirited away by the university by servant gnomes of Opus Dei and taken to the enemy camp at West Point, N.Y., where they were discovered by MSNBC's Hiss Matspews and given to the Salahis as exit visas from Morocco and guest passes to the While House.

Several mistresses of Tiger Woods have come forward and backward to say no one in the history of golf is better when laying two.

There is reason to believe the emails were taken to West Point by President Obama and, according to Faux News, prove a plot exists to show the earth is round by the socialist-communist-nazi-rastafarian-zen-zoroastrian-southern-baptist conspiracy.

Palin's spokesperson said, however, exposing the myth of gravity has freed her to fly like a bird in a big silver thing across the sky.

And that's today news…

"Victory attained by violence is tantamount to a defeat for it is momentary."

So said Gandhi.

"In short: the status quo is not sustainable."

So said the 44th President of the United States last night in his major policy speech Afghanistan to the cadets of the U.S. Military Academy at West Point.

"In early 2003, the decision was made to wage a second war, in Iraq. The wrenching debate over the Iraq war is well-known and need not be repeated here. It's enough to say that for the next six years, the Iraq war drew the dominant share of our troops, our resources, our diplomacy, and our national attention -- and that the decision to go into Iraq caused substantial rifts between America and much of the world."

"The situation in Afghanistan has deteriorated....Afghanistan is not lost, but for several years it has moved backwards."

"I opposed the war in Iraq precisely because I believe that we must exercise restraint in the use of military force, and always consider the long-term consequences of our actions. We have been at war now for eight years, at enormous cost in lives and resources. Years of debate over Iraq and terrorism have left our unity on national security issues in tatters, and created a highly polarized and partisan backdrop for this effort. And having just experienced the worst economic crisis since the Great Depression, the American people are understandably focused on rebuilding our economy and putting people to work here at home."

"Our overarching goal remains the same: to disrupt, dismantle, and defeat al Qaeda in Afghanistan and Pakistan, and to prevent its capacity to threaten America and our allies in the future."

"These are the three core elements of our strategy: a military effort to create the conditions for a transition; a civilian surge that reinforces positive action; and an effective partnership with Pakistan."

"Over the past several years, we have lost that balance. We've failed to appreciate the connection between our national security and our economy. In the wake of an economic crisis, too many of our neighbors and friends are out of work and struggle to pay the bills. Too many Americans are worried about the future facing our children. Meanwhile, competition within the global economy has grown more fierce. So we can't simply afford to ignore the price of these wars. America will have to show our strength in the way that we end wars and prevent conflict -- not just how we wage wars."

"We must draw on the strength of our values -- for the challenges that we face may have changed, but the things that we believe in must not. That's why we must promote our values by living them at home -- which is why I have prohibited torture and will close the prison at Guantanamo Bay. And we must make it clear to every man, woman and child around the world who lives under the dark cloud of tyranny that America will speak out on behalf of their human rights, and tend to the light of freedom and justice and opportunity and respect for the dignity of all peoples. That is who we are. That is the source, the moral source, of America's authority."

"As a country, we're not as young – and perhaps not as innocent – as we were when Roosevelt was president. Yet we are still heirs to a noble struggle for freedom. And now we must summon all of our might and moral suasion to meet the challenges of a new age. In the end, our security and leadership does not come solely from the strength of our arms. It derives from our people -- from the workers and businesses who will rebuild our economy; from the entrepreneurs and researchers who will pioneer new industries; from the teachers that will educate our children, and the service of those who work in our communities at home; from the diplomats and Peace Corps volunteers who spread hope abroad; and from the men and women in uniform who are part of an unbroken line of sacrifice that has made government of the people, by the people, and for the people a reality on this Earth."

"It's easy to forget that when this war began, we were united -- bound together by the fresh memory of a horrific attack, and by the determination to defend our homeland and the values we hold dear. I refuse to accept the notion that we cannot summon that unity again. I believe with every fiber of my being that we -- as Americans -- can still come together behind a common purpose. For our values are not simply words written into parchment -- they are a creed that calls us together, and that has carried us through the darkest of storms as one nation, as one people."

When asked if he thought actions taken by the Bush Administration bore any responsibility for the situation as it exists today, former Vice-President Dick Cheney simply replied, "I basically don't."

"I object to violence because when it appears to do good, the good is only temporary; the evil it does is permanent." – Gandhi.